LAHolden Gets Stuck

Get this... the universe thought it would be hilarious to stop me in my race against time to finally get home by having a random freaking BLIZZARD in North Carolina of all places. I mean come on. I have seen maybe an inch of snow accumulate since moving to Charlotte/Chapel Hill before my senior year of high school and now it snows? Hard? On my last day of finals?

An hour into the trip to Knoxville it started to get pretty bad. About 10 minutes later my dad and I were screaming at each other--he's telling me to pull off because I'm driving NW, into the eye of the snow storm, and I'm yelling and crying back because his expectations are too high-- because my windshield was frozen, paralyzing my visibility and all of the exits I snail-crawled past were covered in inches of snow. I literally couldn't see, my wipers were frozen, the snow was pelting the windshield, I was looking thru the passenger side just to stear, and there was no end in sight. I was screaming and crying at my dad where I wanted my money to go when I died. Maybe you come from the north and you think my behavior is ridiculous, but I used to live in New Jersey... my dad taught me to drive in black ice, so you'd think I would have some gumption on these roads, but man did I think the end was in sight for a little while there. I'm driving in a 2000 Honda Civic of all things, so I mean, come on... what do you expect? Me to be 4-wheeling in my Tahoe?

Eventually I drove down this random street where I finally hung up on my dad who had me in hysterics and was literally tempted to ask one of the home owners if I could stay with them for the night, but my dad called me again. The man was trying to help me, I know that, but he wasn't with me to see the storm itself and commiserate with my problems, so I was getting frustrated that he was saying "Lindsay, turn around" every 10 seconds. Eventually I was able to turn around and head to a hotel... and the blizzard wasn't as nail-biting heading SE as it was NW, so I escaped death. Now I'm cooped up in this hotel outside of Winston-Salem. Apparently the snow is supposed to continue until Sunday, so reaching the loving arms of my family has been temporarily hindered. I swear though, sometimes I feel like my plight is straight out of a sentimental fiction novel. I am that girl who needs saving and God always has to chop me off at the knees to get me to be still... even if it's forcing me to break my race to get home and staying at a hotel by myself. Merhhh. It would have been a better story if a man riding a white horse had plucked me out of the storm. Hahaha.

So many plaguing questions that I have right now start with why?

Bathed in Afterglow

I have my last econ exam today at 12. It will probably take the full 3 hours, but I'm just so incredibly excited to be done with finals... they were the hardest they have ever been for me and my body just can't take any more. I'm popping airborne like it's my job. So, I have this weird thing where I wake up every morning singing a different song that was playing in the background of one of my dreams... I'm unique. But today, I felt it was particularly significant because I feel so, so close to freedom. Enjoy the lyrics.

Just when the days start getting colder,
I walk the streets I never knew
There's some words I never told you.
The sound rings out like the truth.
If you could see what's come over me then you would know
'Cause I'm walking free, the wind at my back
And bathed in Afterglow.
And as I sit here in this dark room,
All I seem to feel is light.
I see color,
I see the maroon in the blood of this life that's ours.
If you could see what's come over me then you would know
That I'm walking free, the wind at my back
And bathed in Afterglow.
Watch the sun, it paints an orange sky.
Lay me down and feel the days gone by.
Just when the day...
Just when the day...
Just when the days start getting longer,
I walk the streets I never knew.
The sun comes out for you.
If you could see what's come over me then you would know
'Cause I'm walking free, the wind at my back
And bathed in Afterglow.
--Vanessa Carlton, "Afterglow"

Wish me luck! Safe travels to all of you who are heading home in the next few days!!! To be continued...

Because I am at Starbucks again, preparing to embark on more Econ studying, and simply can't focus, I figured I would announce my reading list for winter break... which I will be reading (or listening to) on my way to and from a few places.

- Crime and Punishment (CD)
- Atonement
- For Whom the Bell Tolls
- New Moon (yes, I would like to read it again... leave me alone)
- Eclipse (ditto)

I like to read. Mmkay bye.

Don't Judge Me

I know I posted about 4 hours ago, but I don't have a facebook anymore, so I'm dying here. There's nothing for me to look at on the internet right now when I'm getting distracted from studying.

So, I decided to make a list of what my favorite activities were this semester:

- Watching Pride & Prejudice and The Proposal about 900x each
- Visiting Chels & Monique in Albuquerque for fall break :)
- Going climbing for the first time ever with Kelsey
- Eating at El Bandido's like once a week (this will no longer take place because spring break is only a few months away and I really need to start cooking for myself again)
- Going to visit Alexandra in Blacksburg for her bday
- Finding that Tennessee is not so bad after all, even though I really love and miss Charlotte with all my heart (but I refuse to admit that to my parents)
- "Walking Club" with Lindsay where we spend an hour and a half venting about all of our problems that we can't admit to anyone else in the middle of the night
- Katherine's and my awesome Bible study and our pre-bstud Wednesday night dinners
- Spending hours on the phone with LB because she's the only person I can talk to on the phone for that long
- Finding a route to run and maximizing with my Yoga Body Burn DVD (attn: it's time for me to get a harder one... Christmas? Bday?)
- Midnight New Moon showing on Nov. 19 with Alexandra, Lindsay, and Emilie
- Seeing New Moon 5 times (please don't judge me... you don't understand)
- Wednesday mornings with Natalie
- Harassing Marius (Mo-Mo seriously thinks I'm in love with him, probably because I tell him that my love for him runs deeper than he could ever know... hahahaha. For the record, I'm not in love with him but he is my best guy friend).
- Reflecting on England, having such strong memories related to everything while I was abroad, and putting together my postcard collage
- Getting emails from Lori (I miss you, love)
- Realizing that my love for Princess Blue - Little Black Riding Hood is so irrevocable that I literally started crying on my drive home from TN one day and apologized to my car for taking her for granted
- Learning about the Lord
- Paige's wedding
- Having 9 million of my friends get engaged (I also feel a little bitter... not gonna lie)
- My dad finding Mildred (my beloved cat and when I say my beloved, I mean beloved) in a sewer after she was gone for a week (if you wonder why I eat men, it's because they pale in comparison to my dad, how well he loves me, and how much he is willing to do for others)
- Realizing that I have the world's most amazing friends and that I am truly, truly blessed. This is worthy of some examples: first of all, when my mom first admitted that she couldn't find Mille, Linds came right over and stayed the night with me while I sobbed for hours (you don't realize how much I adore my pets, especially Mildred since she's mine) and having all of my buddies keep checking in on Mille's status until my dad found her a week later. Secondly, Kelsey took care of me (she's actually taken care of me countless times, this is just one of them) when I had to go to the ER for my heart problems and kept cracking sick jokes to keep me laughing while the freaking male nurse was feeling me up. Kelsey also tied a pink monkey around my bed post and sat with me when I was sad about Mille.
- Getting in fights about finding a job with my mom.
- Trying to map out the rest of my life and realizing that it really is all in God's hands
- Surprising Christa at her house last night
- Seeing Invictus with Lindsay... AMAZING!!! GO SEE IT. "Cappy" reminded me of Kohan. If you still read this, Kohan McNab, go see Invictus. You are Matt Damon in it... even though you're from NZ.
- Making Marius, James, and Linds watch Greek (aka Cappie) with me on Monday nights
- Driving through the snow in the mountains on my way back to UNC from VT
- Hot military guys at VT...
- Living in this big ol' rancher with 5 other girls
- My christmas tree, my lights, and the wreaths on our front doors
- Kelsey's Halloween spider web
- Being a wigga for Halloween, walking on Franklin with Kelsey and then realizing that we had nothing else to do... "lamest Halloween in all of Christendom" (Kelsey)
- Inducting Kelsey into the world of Mr. Brooks
- Only attracting men of color at the dance club Players.
- "We attract dogs. I mean they're real dogs, Linds" (Kelsey).
- Carolina BBALL. Carolina Football.

I'll get back to you with more later. Tomorrow, I'm going to announce my reading plan for Christmas break.

We Walk in Fields of Gold

4 days of studying left. 5 more days of exam life.

It's not going fast enough, so I'm taking a break, sitting in my bed in my leopard-print snuggie and watching some Hallmark Christmas Classics with Dino. Right now, Billy Ray Cyrus's new movie, "Christmas in Canaan," is on. He talked about it on Rachel Ray, so now I'm watching it. Let me paint a picture for you. The South during the Jim Crow era. Billy Ray's son is a bigot and picks a fight with another black boy on the bus, so Billy decides to teach his son a lesson by making him spend a week with the other boy. He calls it, "punishing them by keeping them together." Anyway, from what I gathered on Rachel Ray, the boys spend half the time with the other family and half the time with Billy's family, and they learn that they have more similarites than differences. Despite the great message, I'm not sure that this is a great movie.

Lindsay and I are watching it together while studying and we picked kids, and by "we picked kids," I meant I dropped the comment that her son was a jerk and Lindsay died laughing. My son is the black boy and Lindsay's son is the bigot. Why? Because my son is strong, dry and intellectual while Lindsay's son is gullible and popular-- he believed that he consumed skunk stew for dinner. It reflects our parenting skills. Although, to give her some credit, her husband is the one that came up with the master plan of punishing them by keeping them together instead of punishing them by keeping them apart. So, at least she married a reformist. I don't even have a husband. Oh no, apparently the drama changed and the boys found an injured dog that was shot in the leg. I can't handle any movie where dogs, horses, or cats get hurt, so this means I'm probably going to lose it unless the dog gets better.

In other news, did I do anything exciting today? Well, I spent 6 hours at Barnes and Noble again, so that was fun and now I'm gonna get back to macro and writing a speech. Carolina is killing me... I can't help but think of all of the other fun things I could be doing instead of studying... so many activities. Sky-Diving, Lazer Tag, counting the rings on an aged tree stump, or talking to Mildred again and again about my feelings while she rubs against my legs and purrs. Oh well, I just have to maintain perspective that I know I can make it through the week. There's nothing like the light at the end of the tunnel.

Peace, Love, and Christmas Cheer,
Linzerina

Counting Down...

Only 3 hellish econ exams and 1 speech away from the end of Fall semester... Let me just say, this has been one of the hardest semesters academically. Carolina, you kill me.

I'm sitting here at the Barnes & Noble at Southpoint Mall preparing to embark on an Advanced Macro study sesh (my hardest class, btw) for my exam on Tuesday. I feel like I've aged 20 years in the past 4 days from all of the work I've been doing. I had my African American Lit exam today at noon and to put it into perspective for you, I wrote and wrote... just about 30 pages of writing on top of our final exam essay that we had to turn it with our exams and that we only got Thursday night. I think I have carpel tunnel. Schmoop.

Whew. However, to think about it positively, on Thursday, I still had 2 essays, a speech, and 4 exams keeping me from sitting by the fire, sleeping in, and watching endless episodes of 24 to prepare for the new season. I am a Christmas freak, but it really is what gets me through finals. I feel so burnt out, but I'm only 6 days away... from the shortest Christmas break we've ever had. Lol.

Okay, well, that's all for now. Oh, and if you're wondering about my facebook... well, I deleted it for the time being. I may be back on December 18, but maybe not. I'm doing just fine without it, though sometimes I type in face... only to remember. There's just not time for me to stalk people right now, so if you want to stalk me, you're going to have to come up with some more creative ways to do that.

Peace, love, and holiday cheer,
L.A.Holden, Attorney at Law

I'm happy, can't you see?

I might lock my secrets up all one by one.
I put 'em all away when I was done.
And I would really love to hear your voice sometime
To close a little distance in my mind.
I'm happy, can't you see?
I'm alright, but I miss you and believe.
-Brandi Carlile, "Happy"

Brothers & Sisters just ended and it truly has become one of my favorite shows these days, along with 24 and Lost, that is--I got tired of all of the sex drama on Grey's and Private Practice and every other effing show, so I just quit on them. Brothers & Sisters is so good because it's a wacked out family with problems... just like every family. I love it.

Tonight it inspired me, as it does most nights, because though I try to be, I'm not the bravest of people. Sally Field, "Norah Holden" (yes, I like her last name) on the show, was giving her son some last minute pointers before he tied the knot with his fiance. She said, "sometimes the things you are most scared of are the things that make you the happiest." It cut me to the core because I'm so afraid of things. I'm so afraid of having to commit to anything. I'm afraid of having to commit to leaving Chapel Hill, living far away from my parents again, and most of all, I'm afraid of showing my feelings or loving someone.

I guess I have built it up in my head, but I will tell you that it was my youth pastor's wife, Missy Scanish, and my mentor, Paige William's fault. They both told me at such an impressionable high school/early college age that I deserved the best and to hold out for the best possible man because they were so worth waiting for. Apparently I am a slightly intense person (Kelsey, Alex, and Lindsay, hold your tongues... they are the ones that told me I am), which I never considered to be a possibility, so I guess I took this advice to heart. I have believed in a fairy tale my whole life... I believe in Taylor Swift "Love Story." Yeah, corny, I know, but I respect her because the girl happens to have a lot of class and talent... and let's be for real here, the girl is dating Taylor Lautner. Anyway, this is all besides the point. The truth is that I was taught to appreciate God's design and timing... and let's be honest, I have a long list of expectations, so it should take a long time for the stars to align, but I believe that they do and I won't allow it when they don't. I believe that each couple's love story is the best love story of all time. I see couples splitting up all the time and it freaks me out because it could happen to anyone, but at the same time I really do believe that if the right person comes along, you fight to stay together. It's just that I met a guy once who rocked my world and met my long list of expectations, even though I chose for a long time not to admit to it. That's what I do, though, I process over long periods of time. Finally, when I was in England, for the first time, I openly admitted to my feelings for him to myself and to a couple other buddies of mine. It's just that it was too late. He came in, interested me, and like "the wind under superman's cape" (a little Lady Antebellum for you), he was gone again. I spend a lot of time thinking that I should have done some things differently... that I could have said different things, shown more interest, or made an attempt to spend more time with him, but I didn't because underneath it all, even though I felt good about him, it didn't feel right to me.

I go back and forth between kicking myself for it and being proud of myself for it. I am waiting for what I was taught to wait for... God. It didn't feel right and now, I trust my judgment. Others have told me that I will never really know unless I bite the bullet and tell him how I feel/felt, but personally, I think that would be creepy and I am not okay with that. He can come to me. I'm old-fashioned like that. I love and care about myself and I chase after the things that I want all of the time. But when it comes to a man, he can chase after me. I was raised by the most incredible father who made me believe that I was a princess. It's what I am. I love myself; I crack myself up all the time; I'm content to be alone because again, I crack myself up; I think I have my head on straight; I think I'm a freak, but I believe in myself and where I'm going; I have the world's most amazing friends and though my family drives me nuts sometimes with their endless questioning of how I live my life and miles of conflicting advice, I have the most supportive and adoring parents and siblings any girl could ever ask for... I understand that maybe I set too high of expectations and that maybe I have too many walls up to support that level of expectations, but it's who I am and I'm comfortable with that... and I am the only one who has to be comfortable with that. No one else has to be because they are not me.

This brings me to my next point. College has been interesting. It has molded and shaped me in ways that I both appreciate and care to not admit. Even the liberals have impacted me in some way. I have never doubted myself, fought for myself, fought with myself, or loved myself more than I have at Carolina. And I wouldn't change a thing because it has shown me how great it feels to get through adversity. I never thought I'd say this, but thank you UNC-Chapel Hill for not always giving me what I want and for teaching me the necessity of fighting for what I need. Good ol' Natalie (and if you are confused about who Natalie is, those of you who need to know who Natalie is, already know) said it best when she told me that underneath it all I'm fighting to be me. I'm wrestling with myself. There are endless supplies of opinions and advice that I receive on a daily basis, but in the end it is me that chooses who I am supposed to be. Maybe this is common sense to you, but Natalie floors me once a week. She said, "you're fighting to stay true to yourself, Lindsay, against all of the reasons not to stay true to who you are, but keep fighting because who you are is worth fighting for."

I'm a words of affirmation girl. I took a love languages test, okay, so I know that I feel the most loved when someone encourages me through words, whether it be through letters, or facebook wall posts, or passing/fleeting comments. I feel the most loved by the Lord when I read verses from him describing how much He loves me. It's just how I receive love the best. Yes, I love quality time and physical touch and all the others too, but one word really can make or break me. It's part of the reason I love writing so much. It's why I cry when people yell at me or are disappointed in me or say one word that shouldn't hurt me, but does. So much of my life comes down to my love/disdain for choice words. But anyway, what Natalie told me just made me feel completely awesome about myself.

I've come along way since last year. I wasn't ready for anything this time last year... I really was walking around in darkness because I was so confused as to where to head next. It was like middle school all over again in a struggle to preserve my identity, except 10 times worse. Through studying abroad, psycho-analyzing my life and making the choices that I feel good about, I'm out of that darkness now and I'm so happy. I'm comfortable with who I am. I'm ready to fight for my passions and fight for the ability to love. I can admit now that I have walls up, okay? THERE. I said it. I have obstacles that even I can't seem to get around, but I am working on them. College has taught me to hate the definition of "normal." The people that are the most exciting, bring about the most earth-shattering inventions or necessary changes to the world are by no means "normal." I will spend my life attempting to mimic them in some small way... I'm not saying that I am going to be Mother Theresa or Nelson Mendela, but I promise that I will be Lindsay Holden and everyday I will fight to improve myself. I will fight to stay true to myself and true to whose I am no matter the consequences. I will fight the most when who I am or what I believe in is being chastised. Most of all, I will admit now that I am okay with being different. There is always room for improvement and I will be the first one to admit that, but I will never, never permit someone else to change me. Only God has the power to do that. There are too many abnormal and awesome people out there for me to spend my life blending in with the rest of the crowd and I won't do it.

I don't know how I got so off topic of Sally Field's comment, but I guess I actually didn't get too far off topic. Nearing the end of my last fall semester is really weird. It's bittersweet because I'm ready to move on and spread my wings, but at the same time, I'm freaking out that I have to grow up and support myself. The past 4 years have been more selfish than I care to admit, but they have shown me the importance of selflessness. I can't wait to try to live in a way that benefits others, not just myself. That is now my life-after-college goal.

And when did you stop missing me?

Where to begin. I just have to vent, and writing is my purging channel of choice. It's either this or my journal and I just think I would fall asleep if I cracked out the journal and started writing, though that may be more therapeutic to me since I wouldn't have to censor myself, but oh well. This is already getting to be too James Joyce' with the "stream-of-consciousness" theme going on here, but alas, I have to do what I have to do.

So, let me just begin with Thanksgiving break. My family, as you know, has recently moved to Knoxville, TN. If you want to know how I'm feeling about it, it's weird, but other than that I'm pretty stoic about the whole thing; since we've moved so many times in my life, it's a non-issue. I loved Charlotte, but it's okay. So, Joe-Ho and I headed out to Knox for Thanksgiving, dropped our bags and then headed to Nashville Thanksgiving morning to meet with my mom's side of the family for the big feast. My parents surprised us with a stay at the Gaylord Opryland Hotel, which was really awesome. After the feast, we basically worked off all of our food walking around the hotel and then enjoyed some beverages at a Jack Daniels bar inside the hotel. Our waitress told us that the nearby mall was opening at midnight for Black Friday, so instead of hitting the hay, we instead shopped from 12:30-3:30 a.m. Joe, Mindy, Tim, and I. Good times. My dad had taken a shot of whiskey on top of some extra choice beverages, so the shopping was especially pleasant for him. :) Anyway, Joe and I helped my mom pick out all of our Christmas presents because everything was half off or more (the perks of braving the Black Friday crowd). So, later Friday morning, we began our 2 hour trek back to Knox. Happy days. I am happy shopping. Yes, I'm girly and like to shop... but I really love picking clothes out for other people, so that's when I like it most. After shopping awhile later in Knox, we came home and I checked my facebook for the first time in a few days.

First wave of nausea. So, I dated a guy a couple of times in Charleston (freshman year of college). He was from the Citadel (whoot! whoot!) and I started to really like him when all of the sudden his relationship status on facebook changed to "in a relationship with... " I have since blocked this out of my mind because we were in the middle of "going on dates" when it happened and it was pretty devastating for me. So, I get on facebook on Black Friday just to realize that his engagement was announced on my home page. Awesome. Alex and Lindsay have both expressed time and time again how much it sucks when someone you liked gets engaged, even when you don't have feelings for them anymore, and ignorantly, I was always like, "ehhh... it's whatever." Yeah, now I know. I just felt nauseous for the next couple of days on and off, that's all. Don't worry, no tears were shed.

Tonight, however, I went to see the movie, "Everybody's Fine," with my buddy/ex-roommate Ana. Don't let that title fool you. It is not a happy movie unless you're sick and think the ending is an excuse for a happy ending. Whatever. I was a wreck. I will spare you the details of this movie, but it was not at all the holiday-family comedy that I thought it would be. I was sobbing left and right. I mean, it's not unusual for me to cry in movies because honestly, I cried in 300, so I can cry in anything, but this movie stuck with me. Ana and I walked out of the theater and she's like, "well that was a happy movie," and my eyes just started to water all over again. We parted ways and I went to buy some Christmas wreaths for my front doors (Chapel Hill home not Knox, and I will put up pics later). I think the Christmas tree people thought I was nuts because my eyes were all red and blotchy, but whatever. But, then after purchasing the wreaths, I was walking away and then just slid and fell on the walkway. The salesman comes over to me and he goes, "do you need help getting back to your car, ma'am?" and I'm like, "(fake laugh) no thanks." Yeah, apparently I lack hand-eye or any kind of coordination for that matter when my thoughts are blurred by sad movie scenes. Eventually, though, I made it back to my car in one piece. Once in my car, my parents call me and I start sobbing on the phone when related the details of the movie... I think it's safe to say that they really want to see it now. So, 7 or 8 miles later, I get home and still thinking about the movie and crying, I glare forward past Kelsey and our black panther statue. Kelsey comes into my room to ask what's wrong, and I just erupt all over again for the next half hour. I tell her all of the details of the movie and she just gets mad that someone would allow for so much sadness in a movie entitled "Everybody's Fine" and eventually got me out of my emotional state.

The movie just got to me because I realized how much we underestimate our parents. Robert DeNiro is all by himself in the movie and it just really bothered me. I don't like to think of my family being too far away from one another and we sort of are right now. I mean we're not too far, but we're far enough. Melissa and Tommy are in DC, I'm in Chapel Hill, Joe's in Charlotte, and my parents are in Knox. Right now, especially, I just feel so divided. I mean, I'm applying for jobs and studying for finals at the same time, and now I have to go to see that movie.

The fact of the matter is that I change my mind daily. There are few things that don't change: namely, my love for God, my love for my family and friends, etc. But, everyday, I "feel it deep, feel it low," and come up with new dreams and aspirations. You may know that I have been highly considering law school, but that I was going to take a year off before going down that road, but I've since been thinking that I just want my life to start. I mean I'm living now, but I'm ready to get out there and do something with myself and I just can't fathom another 3 years of school right now. So, I'm holding off on that one for the time being. I believe in myself and that's why I just want to start working and building a life for myself. You know, I think I'll end up in DC, but now I'm freaking out about having to move away from my parents, family, and friends for real. It's like I'm having a panic attack. This movie just confirmed my fears and I just want us all to be close, even if I'm jetting all off here and there all the time... I just want to be planted somewhere near my parents, Joe, and Melissa.

I'm a freak, I know, but sometimes I get so blinded by the fact that it's time for me to get serious and to map out a life plan that I forget to live and I forget how much love is surrounding me. I get caught up in becoming independent and learning how to take care of myself that I forget how to be dependent and needy on my family. They're not going anywhere. Though, I may be getting ready to embark on the next adventure, it doesn't mean I have to go at it alone.

I'm Watching Pride and Prejudice

Mr. Darcy: You must know... surely, you must know it was all for you. You are too generous to trifle with me. I believe you spoke with my aunt last night, and it has taught me to hope as I'd scarcely allowed myself before. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes have not changed, but one word from you will silence me forever. If, however, your feelings have changed, I will have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love... I love... I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on.

Elizabeth Bennet: I do like him. I love him. He’s not proud. I was wrong. I was entirely wrong about him. You don’t know, Papa, if I told you what he was really like, what he’s done…

Two of my favorite quotes in the world.

The Countdown Begins...

4 days until Alexandra Pauls and I reunite... she is making a pre-Charleston stop to come visit tarheel nation! And yes, we will be at the 12:05 a.m. premiere of New Moon.
5-6 days until Lisa Lou visits for her 3rd annual pre-Thanksgiving venture to tarheel nation-dEliCiOuS pumpkin cookies in tow. We, too, will most likely be going to see New Moon.
11 days 'til the Macy's Day Parade... and plenty of Mindy Sue's green bean casserole. Yum.
12 days 'til Black Friday. Yes.
Weeks that generally tend to pass quickly, but painfully in between these two glorious holidays are summed up in one word: Finals.
39 days until Christmas. Umm, this is pretty much my reason to survive the entire year. Christmas is my favorite day every year. My birthday pales in comparison to how special Christmas is to me. I'm a tradition lover.
... And then of course there's mi cumpleanos en enero, but I don't really care to be 22. I like 21. :)

... REJOICE. IT'S THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR!!!!! Bust out your Christmas music like me while going for runs and enjoy some "Santa packs are comin'" (I miss those commercials) Diet Cokes. Decorate. Bake all kinds of crap. Stimulate the economy. Love the Lord...

The only things that could possibly make this even more beautiful would be a) the ability to wear my winter coat and b) facebook re-instating the "Countdown to Christmas Tree" where you can leave presents under your friends' trees. And yes, lame-o, I know Christmas is not all about presents... believe me when I say, I know what it's about. But it is fun to leave gifts under facebook trees.

Get excited! Amen.

Angerrrrr

I really can't stand people's ignorance anymore. If you want to be a liberal... I have nothing against you, I never have, I never will. Your sardonic ways really prove to me that your actions do not measure up to your words. Don't go around putting words in people's mouths that we hate mankind because we think that pulling out of the war at the present time would bring more bad than good. I have a problem with that. I have a problem when you are ignorant about the issues that your liberalism justifies in your mind and then you yell at me for... No, I don't put myself in the "liberal" category, but news flash "peace preachers," just because I'm not liberal does not mean that I am one of the small minority of Americans who proclaim that they hate all non-Christians. In fact, it pains me to hear you say those words because it literally emphasizes how little you truly understand.

You speak about peace and love, yet you have no idea what that looks like in a simple conversation with another American. I love people. I think they are God's gift to the world. I think red, yellow, black, white, Jew, Hindi, Muslim, Christian, Buddhist, Yogi, etc. are all precious and all deserving of freedom and a chance to lead a better life. You call yourselves peace lovers, so why don't you consider spending more time strategizing how to keep the peace in your everyday life before you take your anger out on the first non-Lib you come across. Oh, and next time, you want to say that Fort Hood was a mere inconvenience... fulfilled by a man who was, and I quote, "sick in the head," why don't you put yourself in the place of those twelve families who are directly affected and all those indirectly affected in the mourning of a lost loved one.

Call & Response: An African-American Tradition

This is devoted to you, Lori.

So, one of my best friends in the world, Lori Elisabeth Baldwin, just left Wednesday for Spain for a year. Now I can be on the other side of a study abroad program and know what it feels like to be left behind, but also how wonderfully excited I am to hear about her adventures to come.

Your email today made me want to hop on a plane and come to you, get you all nestled in, and then once you were settled, make a discreet escape. The first couple of days are SO ROCKY. I was a mountain of emotions. I would start to cry in front of random Englishmen simply because I couldn't find my way back home or I had no idea how to get to a place called "The Edge" to meet my new friends, but mostly because I could never seem to get ahold of my parents. The last was the most devastating... I mean you are in a totally new place and just need comfort and I needed my parents, but I had no idea how to get ahold of them.

You are doing all the right things. That's what I want you to know. Your email ripped my heart out and definitely produced some wet eyes if you will, but I want you to know that you are doing all of the right things. Please cling to the Brits for now. Tell me all about them and who they are and what they do. Have someone that you can share/complain with until you feel comfortable enough with your surroundings to go big before going home... :).

You have already had your first adventure going out... and yes, we English party hard. :) I'm so glad they took care of you. You are going to find wonderful, stimulating, and lovely people. It will take a few days or a week, but then suddenly it will be like freshman orientation all over again and every abroad student will be clinging to one another... once you find each other, which you will. I also have a feeling though that you will have many a Spanish friend, and for that I am so excited.

You are missed here already, Lori. Don't for a second think that you're not. Remember what I told you, nothing changes back at home even after you have had an earth-shattering and mind-blowing experience and are exploding with tumultuous emotions that you want to share with everyone, but no one can really understand. So far since you've been gone, I've accomplished next to nothing. Yesterday I watched the season premier of Grey's Anatomy. Before that I spent 6 hours in class, went to the mall with Emilie, and came home to lay on my bed for hours. In fact, basically many of my roomies were watching Grey's in our living room and I didn't even leave my bed... hahaha. Yes, you know me so well. After that, Em C and I made our way over to Lindsay's house for her "close to midnight" birthday celebration.

...Yes, absolutely nothing changes. While you get to explore the EU, I am currently sitting on the floor with my computer propped up on my blue trunk next to a couple of my sweatshirts and towels, listening to Rose talk on the phone with someone and Emilie blaring the TV/yelling at Adam on the phone; after this I am going to force myself to move and perhaps go to the gym (?) followed by the DMV. And who knows, after that I just may get a pedicure because I can. Nothing changes. I have nothing earth-shattering to tell you about my day, but it will be a good day nonetheless. But nothing will be as awesome sounding as exploring Olveido. "Go ye."

I want you to know that every little thing is gonna be alright. I love you. And I love that you got drunk with my Englishmen... brings a slight smile to my face. How long are they in town? Lori, explore your town, get lost, get acquainted, cry on your way home because you're so lost, eat as much food as you possibly can, drink as much FRIGGIN wine as you can put down because once you get back to America... well, let's just say people here are uptight about alcohol, but they just don't know how awesome before clubbing.

Go big or go home, sister. I love you. Thank you for the email.

Time is so short and I'm sure, there must be something more...

COLDPLAY.

Whew... Deep breath before I dive into the Viva La Vida tour. Okay, first can I say that I'm going to need to come up with some more dreams because I am just scratching them off my list left and right. I feel so blessed to, at 21, have lived in a foreign country and seen the one band that I've wanted to see live since freshman year of high school... it only took me 7 years. Lol.

If I could pick a night that could be the culminating night of my summer it would have been last night, Thursday, Aug. 6. It was just so explosive and moving and wonderful. I am not just being some super fan when I say that Coldplay is amazing live--I mean it. They are. Through their perfectly coordinated light shows and balloons/beach balls.... shoot, I tell you what... I had the time of my life. It certainly helped that I was with some of my absolute best friends. I had Lori to my left and Lindsay to my right. Happy Birthday, Lor! And of course, J-Newb was there and Hannah Beth Spring, my love. So much fun.

The band played songs from all of their albums and it was just wonderful. I probably called about 9 or 10 of the same people over and over again so that they could hear the songs that I associate with them or that they have grown particularly attached to over the years. You see, Coldplay isn't just a band to me, it's a lifestyle. Really and truly. Sorry J-Sief for calling you 978 times. The best part of the evening for me, though, was when Chris Martin & co. come jumping off the stage with some basic equipment and then make a run for it into the lawn where we were sitting and began to perform "Green Eyes." I had no idea they were going to play this song (I mean, naturally, of course I was hoping that they would, but I didn't know for sure) and they performed this of all songs standing 20 feet in front of me. I tried to film it so I could have it with me forever, but some loser in front of me who was like 6'4" decided it would be cool to constantly get in my way... Oh well, at least I have it in my memories. Green Eyes is basically written for me, so that's why I love it so much... hahahaha jk, but it is one of my two favorite songs ever written--namely, 1 of 2 lifesongs.

The boys sang "Billie Jean" as a tribute to the King of Pop, may he rest in peace, Michael Jordan and are so generous that they gave us all a copy of their "Left Right Left Right Left" CD because they were so grateful that we came to the show... I know, I know.

So, this morning, since it was Lori, my love's, birthday, I decided to take her to breakfast before heading to Charlotte for the rest of the weekend... we had good times. It ended up being the cheapest birthday breakfast ever since we went to Jessee's, the new-in-town coffee shop that she works at, and her co-workers made her french toast and coffee for free for breakfast. I got a soy ice chai tea latte and called it a day for a whopping $3.25. It was a beneficial birthday for both of us, but it also doesn't surprise me because Lori is one of the luckiest people I know... the stars align for her sometimes. Makes me jealous.

I listened to my new free COLDPLAY CD on the way home today about 3 or 4 times and it was fantastic. I had several life revelations while listening to it, so I'm pretty pumped about that. Anyway, at the end of the day all I have to say is that I'm grateful to Coldplay and awesome friends who have no qualms with being weird.

Peace be with you.

That is just the way it was,
Nothing could be better,
Nothing ever was.
Oh, they say you can see your future
Inside a glass of water, the riddles and the rhymes.
"Will I see heaven in mine?"

DC Chillin', PG Chillin'

Soooo, I'm at Panera in Glen Dirty preparing to study for my last final of my UNC online classes for the summer, but as usual, I'm detoxing from work via facebook stalking. YAYYY. People are failing on the excitement channel, that's all I can say. I thought the summer was meant to be the time when people experience summer romances (summers of loveeee) and vacation extravaganzas and the time for wild and crAzy adventures, but no. This summer, it appears that everyone is holed up and keeping to themselves. Whatever, be a loner... as of tonight at 8 pm, I only have to worry about work!!!! It's going to be amazing to have a month off from class-- I'm just super pumped about it.

Things to look forward to: Coldplay concert, Aug. 7-- I have a CWS day that Friday, so I'm making a trip up to the Thrill for the night and partake in another of the adventures listed on my bucket list. I'll let you know how that goes.

If I was still in Europe, I'd add a trip to Santorini, Prague, or Istanbul in there for good measure. It's a hard pill to swallow, let me tell you.

Life has been exciting to say the least. Kate, Alex and I enjoyed a visit from our good buddy, J-Men over happy hour last week... good times. Then, K.Burr came to town and texted me 24/7, but never came to visit. Loser. This weekend, Xandra and I are going to go see, The Ugly Truth, naturally. Perhaps in Alexandria, perhaps in G-Town, who knows. I'd like to get back to the beach at some point, but who knows when that will happen. Work has been a lot of fun. I'm enjoying it, or maybe I just love hearing about Alex and Kate's workday drama, and I am a fan of the work I'm doing this summer again... I don't feel like an intern anymore because Alex and I chill with all the full-timers now, so I guess you could say, I am comfortable in good ol' Suitland now. Also, I think that the culture shock has finally subsided. However, I had to call my boss who is currently in London and an Englishman and then an English woman answered the phone/re-directed my call and it all came back. I got a little choked up. It was lovely to hear the English accent again, especially since the Southern English accent is so much more sophisticated than the Northern English accent... I miss it.

In other news, as of last night, I completed my first short story... Pretty sure I wrote that my final project for my Fiction Writing course was completing a short story in an earlier post, so I am officially done with that course. I have no idea what my grade will be as my professor never put a letter grade on any of my assignments, but he sent me a private email saying that he hoped I signed up for the next level Fiction Writing course, so perhaps that is a good sign. You never know with UNC though... you think you're doing so well, but then you get an exam or paper back and you realize you're just average. It's a stellar way to maintain the optimism. No, I think I have done pretty well in my online classes. They were quite tedious at times and it was sometimes difficult to stay motivated and on task without a formal meeting time, but all in all, I think that they went well and will hopefully be GPA boosters. And, I passed all of my Sheffield courses, so that is good too... I'm not going to lie, if I had taken those classes in America I would have busted my butt a little bit more, but since I only had to pass with a 50 or above, I slacked a little. Anyway, if you would like to read my short story, let me know, and I'll email it to you. I considered posting it on my blog, but it's a little too private for the internet. Mindy, my mum, told me it made her cry. ;) She's such a lover.

Special thanks to: Alexandra Pauls, Lindsay Saladino, Genevieve Salmon, Monique Hernandez, Chelsea Murphy, Kohan McNab, Caitlin Walsh, Luc Dallaire--Cait's boyfriend (whom I've never met, but still wrote about... is that weird?), Julia Amato, Jim Goodliffe, and others for being my inspiration this semester. Though only Dino, G-Salm, Julz, and Jim were characters in my final project, the rest of you were utilized throughout the semester in various papers and projects. I plan to continue writing short stories for the time being... I did not realize how huge of an impact people (not just those listed above) make on you until you attempt to describe their entire persona in 500 words or less. Again, weird? I know I'm weird, but I love you all.

That's all for now... it's seriously time for me to study as my exam is at 5 p.m., which is in 2 hours. Payce. And for old time's sake, cheers...

Here in America, we Speak American

So, I'm back home. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to say, but I'll try to come up with some words.

I made it. I'm actually fairly impressed at my luck too because Heathrow is freaking massive and my flight from Manchester was an hour delayed. I landed at Heathrow at 1015 in terminal 1 and had to get to terminal 3 by 1035... yeah right. I had to jog a mile with my forty-eight pound backpack and duffle to get to some kind of shuttle just to jog another mile just to see the departures screen. I started bawling when I was on the shuttle because I just knew I had missed my flight and here I was hoping to have time to stroll through the Heathrow mall and shop at Harrod's for old times sake. I prayed that God would have compassion on me and either delay my flight or have one that I could catch close behind it. Finally when I found the departure screen the only flight to "Washington" said it was leaving at 1150. I teared up again from sweet, sweet joy. I get a little emotional when I'm travelling on my alone and have had little or no sleep, I guess. So, after an 8 hour flight across the pond, I made it. Let me tell you it's kind of surreal. Obviously, I know what America looks alike, but it was still unusual stepping off the plane and seeing Americans for the first time after 5 months. Despite my annoyance at carrying zillion pound bags, I still managed to chuckle to myself over how American everyone looked. My parents and bro were there to greet me at the airport and they had a balloon that read, "To Cheer You" because it was the closest thing to "Cheers" that they could find and really embarrassing posters that said things like "Welcome Home, Miss International" and "Number 1 NC Tar Heel." Yeah, you know how that goes. Oh, the affirmation. But, they brought me flowers and that was cute. I'm not going to lie, I cried again when I saw them, but what the frick else is new.

From there, we stepped outside the Dulles International Baggage Claim into the 90 degree F heat and I felt like death had come early. Then, I realized I had forgotten how huge American cars were... not that I miss small Euro cars at all, but it was still unusual seeing all of the Yukons, Tahoes, Suburbans, and Silverados/F150s everywhere. My pops piled all my crap up and I retrieved my gargantuan Uni of Sheffield robe and some jelly babies to wear and eat in the Durango, so I could maintain a connection to my abroad time while making the 7 hour drive back to Charlotte. To my surprise, we drove an hour and a half north to meet Melissa, Alyssa, and Karys and my cousin, Melody, who loves me at Outback in Bowie, Maryland. Karys is beautiful and I love, love, love her, and she is even more adorable in person. We enjoyed a good dinner, despite my lack of appetite, and it was pretty chaotic because everyone was talking over each other and I realized that nothing had changed at all since I left five months ago. After awhile, I just wanted to go to sleep, and then Melissa surprised me by telling me that her, Alyssa, and Karys would be coming back to Charlotte with us until we drive back up to move me into GW on Friday. That was sweet. We're making a detour 3 hours into the drive to visit my house in Chapel Hill and eat on Franklin. I'm excited for that.

Other than that, I haven't done much except try to get re-acclamated to the time change and be an insomniac who strolls around the house with Mildred (my cat) following close behind all the while. I finally slept through the night last night from midnight to 8:40. I was pretty pumped about that. I spent Friday driving alone from 12 pm to 11 pm. It was nice to be behind the wheel again, plus my mom let me drive her Lexus because my dad is currently installing a new radiator and hood on Princess Blue, so that was nice. Today I got to go to Elevation (www.elevationchurch.org) for the first time in 7 months and it was awesome, but of course Pastor had his week off the one time that I am there, so naturally, I was bummed. Perry Noble spoke in his place, and he was good, but definitely no Steven Furtick. Alyssa came with us and got a free Elevation Church t-shirt. Then, we proceeded to eat at On the Border while everyone cooed at Karys for an hour and a half and planned my fam's trip to the beach for the week starting 4 July. I will go just for the weekends, probably, unless there is too much going on, in which case, I'll probably be just chilling with Alex and Kate.

Tomorrow I have to go to the dentist. I hate the dentist, but I love the dental hygenist lady that I get everytime. It will probably be the last time I go there because Mindy and Tim are packing up and moving to Knoxville, Tennessee since my momma got a new job with TVA. My mom and I both start work on June 22. How precious is that? It's good to be home, but at the same time, it's wierd to be back and be so full of life and bursting with new information, but having no one to really share it with, except Monique, Chelsea, Alexandra, Lindsay, and Genna on skype. I never expected my study abroad experience to be so awesome, so it's a little more difficult to adjust than I thought-- more than just time changes. The six of us are planning a reunion soon, though, because I'm pretty sure they are near and dear to my heart now, so we're going to make these trips happen. Anyway, I'm excited to start work because I think I'll be doing some pretty interesting things this summer and I'll be with Xandra and Kate all summer. So, we'll tear up DC. I just hope some campus police people don't recognize me on the GW campus...

I plan on keeping up with my blog because I like doing it, but I doubt I'll have as exciting stories to tell. They will probably be a little less frequent, but I will still keep it up. Until my next blog, thanks for reading and I look forward to seeing y'all again really soon!

PS- Where the frick did TWITTER come from? Will someone please take the time to explain it to me?

Ish

I know, I know... I suck. I haven't update in awhile, but I have been so negligent to sit around on my computer when I have so little time left here in England. According to the Virgin Atlantic website, I'm down to 2 days, 16 hours to be exact. It's a little bittersweet, I'm not going to lie. I'd say I'm 2/3 nerves, 1/3 excitement to board a plane back to America. It's going to be weird, that's for sure.

I want to go into more details and put up pictures of Barcelona with Ana and her family, but I don't really have the time right now because I'm studying for my B.Shake's exam (William Shakespeare for those who lack the ability to read between the lines on that one) and saying goodbye to my other half, Lindsay Saladino. Thank God she's my fellow Tarheel, or I'm not sure how I'd be able to function. Anyway, just to give you an idea about B'Cona... it was gorgeous. Right up there with Venizia. Beautiful and wonderful and artistic and Picasso everywhere. You'll like it... go. It was the first time I've travelled by myself since being in England (obviously, I've flown by myself, but not to entirely different countries) and was a little nervous about managing to get around in Spain, but my speaking abilities proved helpful. I took two buses to get to the airport and then got on a bus in Barcelona-Girona to get to the B'Cona City Centre than I took a metro to a tram-- from there, I walked to the hotel. My favorite line was, "Donde esta la linea verde o amarilla?" These spanish guys came up to me and were seriously trying to determine whether I was English or Spanish, so I decided to keep the mystery alive and just smile at them and walk away. Plus, I was alone and being cornered by two older men in the evening would not fly.

Faces of Barcelona by Pablo Picasso

After I finally got to the hotel (about 2 hours late), Ana, her dad, and I went and got some paella at like 10:30 pm... you know, the Spaniards celebrate the siesta, so restaurants don't really open until after 9. It was fabulous. I never realized how much I hated English food until I went to Spain and ate things with flavor and spice again. Their hotel was tight, so I got a greattttt night of sleep and then woke up the next morning and went on a private tour of Barcelona with Ana and Tiffany (Ana's step-mom). The best cathedral I have ever seen is in Barcelona. I was enthralled by its uniqueness and by the fact that Gaudi (the original architect/sculpturist of the cathedral) was never able to see it completed... it is the only cathedral in the world to be restored and built at the same time. It's been in the works since the mid to late 1800s and isn't expected to be completed until somewhere around 2021 or something like that. Insane, ay? Anyway, if you find yourself in Spain, please go to La Sagrada Familia (literally, the Sacred Family) because it is magnificent... it represents the three most important events of Jesus' life-- birth, death, and resurrection, and it is a masterpiece of detail.

La Sagrada Familia... notice the construction!

A little bit closer now...

Even closer... note the detail.

After our tour, we grabbed some salads... which I have not had since being in the UK as well and they were DELICIOUS. The sun was out by this time, so Ana and I called it a day and tanned by the pool. I was ecstatic because I haven't seen the sun in so long. The next day we woke up and tanned some more, and I swam some laps, before heading back to the city to do some shopping and post card finding (for me). Of course this all took place in Las Ramblas, another culturally awesome area of Barcelona. We ate some tapas, and I basically drank a jug of Sangria because Ana hasn't acquired the taste yet (I guess that's what Europe does to you), then went home and passed out. The next day we woke up pretty early and I headed back al aeropuerto (back to the airport). It was a wonderful journey and Mr. Moorefield paid for me to take a taxi back to the first bus because he was horrified by how many transportation transfers I made on the way there. But, I would do anything to get to Ana. I'd walk a 1000 miles, or tell a guy to do that for you at least. ;) Ana and I had a great time together and it was a blast reuniting with the Moorefields on vacation once again.

Apart from that, I've gone out a few times with my buds to get our dance on and we also enjoyed a girls night out on June 1 because my Chelsea and Monique left us for Austria and then Rome. I'm so jealous, but also very appreciative for the travelling that I have been able to experience since getting here. It's given me an even bigger bug than before, so we'll see what's next on the list. I'm thinking after we graduate-- a longer trip thru Italia and Greece are in order. I'd really like to wave to Benedict if given the chance. Then, eventually, I'll get my butt back to Spain and onto Morocco (but Tiffany wants me to meet someone from there first, so that I'm able to get around okay), so that I can get into Africa. I have a lot of ideas up my sleeve, so we'll see how successful I am at putting them in motion. On our girls night out (sorry for that long tangent), Chels, Mon-Mon, Genevieve, Alexandra, Lindsay, and I took loads of group photos around the University of Sheffield campus. We wore white shirts and jeans and looked like morons, but I promised it would look good on camera and it did... even though I'm sure we screamed Americans. I've included one such picture. Know that there are plenty more where that came from if you feel like being entertained on facebook.


I apologize again for neglecting my audience, but my blog made it to google, so I'm pretty pumped about that. I may fit in another blog before I roll out Tuesday night to stay at a hotel at Manchester airport because of my early flight on Wednesday, but no promises. I think that I will keep this up even after getting back to the states because it has become a catharsis of sorts for me and a way to refresh my memories. Although, my life will probably not be nearly as entertaining and exciting as it has been over the past five months, but you never know. You might be entertained by all of the weddings taking place this summer... it's wierd. I'll let you know what happens when I meet Karys Jane for the first time. :)

My sweet ol' Tapton Room. I'll miss you, Tapton...

Until next time, hasta luego.

B'Cona, here I come...

BARCELONA en la manana!!!

Le dare los detalles en el miercoles o jueves (I will give you the details on Wednesday or Thursday).

YAY FOR SUNSHINE!!!!

Birth of Baby Karys, Edinburgh, and Fiction Writing

Sorry it has taken me awhile to update. Believe it or not, I have been stressed out these past few weeks with seemingly endless essays both from my online courses that I'm taking this summer from UNC and Sheffield essays/exam preparations. However, loads of things have happened in the last few weeks.

FIRST AND FOREMOST IS THE BIRTH OF MY PRECIOUS NIECE, KARYS JANE FOUT!!!

Weighing in at an even 8 pounds and 20 inches long, B.K. (Baby Karys) was born at 5:13 am on May 14, 2009. She has a full head of hair and the doctors said she has the longest eyelashes they have ever seen even being in their line of business for ages. I guess the long eyelashes are big in our family, ay? She is absolutely beautiful and it is killing me not to be able to hold her right now. I never thought that I would cry, but when my mom held up the phone in the hospital as Karys first began to wail, I started sobbing happy tears. I just wish I could see her for myself. Welcome to the world, wee one. I look forward to holding you in 21 days. :) Both mom and baby are doing very well... my mom and dad are hanging out with Melissa and Tommy until Thursday of this week and they say that she needs to eat about 12-13 times a day... and she lets them know. From the moment I got to see her flipping every which way during my sister's ultrasound to dodge the camera, I knew she would be a scrappy little thing with a big personality.

Edinburgh, Scotland

Touristy, but also a must see when in Edinburgh.

Friday: G-Salm and I woke up at 2:15 to catch a cabbie to the coach for a 6 hour bus ride. Oh what fun. We arrived in Edinburgh around 0830 where Natalie, a friend of my friend Heather's, met up with us to show us around. We grabbed some PORRIDGE IN THE MORRIDGE and poured some honey on top of it, and had a delicious, cholesterol-reducing, breakfast. Then, we walked to her place to check our emails and stuff and waste some time. Around 11ish, the boys arrived, so we went to go pick them up from the train station... those lucky dudes could afford the comfort of a train round trip. We walked down Princes Street and then got to the corner of the Royal Mile and Blair Street where our apartment was to unload our stuff. If you ever go to Edinburgh, I highly recommend going the apartment route. It was really nice and split between 7 of us, it was pretty reasonably priced as well. After that, Genna, Kohan, Bearyn, Taylar and I proceeded to go on a castle tour (~12 GBP). The castle was amazing... aside from the rain. I didn't realize how extravagant it would be, but you really can't understand it unless you do in fact purchase the ticket to tour the inside. A mighty fortress it is with heaps of history. After the castle, we walked to pick Shibby up from the bus and then Kohan and I made tacos for dinner. Then, I went to pick up Dino from the train because she couldn't make the bus with Genna and I in the morning.

Edinburgh Castle from afar.

I'm an economist, so this meant something to me. Invisible hand, anyone?

After picking up Lindsay and making her quesadillas, I went back to Natalie's to get ready for a night out while everyone else got ready in the apartment. We ended up going to this really unusual club that featured straight techno. I don't know why we stayed there, but we did, and we paid 4 GBP for it too. Oh well. It was very Euro and cultural of us... we were just looking for something besides constant techno. At least it was literally right across the street from our place.

Saturday: I woke up bright and early because I had left my stuff at my friend Heather's house and needed it to survive. I woke Natalie up at about 930, which I felt bad about, but I really needed my stuff and needed to know how to get there. She refused to let me go on my own, which was really sweet, so she walked with me. We got my stuff and then decided to be nice and grab the makings for bacon rolls for everyone else... a uniquely UK breakfast dish. Genna and I made the breakfast while I ate porridge because it is basically oatmeal with delicious honey and I love oatmeal, so there's no question about my love for porridge. After breakfast, Genna, Linds, Shibby, Bearyn, Kohan, Taylar, and I went on a 3 hour walking tour around Edinburgh. It was pretty tight, but it also got tiring after awhile. My favorite by far was the tour of Greyfriar's Graveyard. Not only was the story about the dog waiting by his owner's grave for 13 years a beautiful and depressing story, but it was also the birthplace of many of J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter character names... which, let's be for real here, peaked my interest. See if you can spot the name that she used from this sign:

The window above the "Furniture" sign is where J.K. Rowling sat and wrote Harry Potter. She figured that buying a couple cups of coffee every few hours in the coffee shop was cheaper than heating her flat, so that's what she did. Now she's more wealthy than the Queen of England.

After the walking tour, we attempted to climb Arthur's Seat. I hope I am making Kyle Burr happy with all of the things I was able to accomplish in his favorite city in one weekend. He gave me a list to do, and I tried to take care of every one. Unfortunately, it rains in the UK, so we got a little more than halfway up Arthur's Seat before the boys decided it was too treacherous to continue. Let me tell you though, Shibby, Genna, Lindsay, and I spotted the boys literally scaling the hill up the mountain versus taking the path, so we decided to be warriors and prove that anything they could do, we could do better. I think we made it up much faster too by the way. At least I was determined to be faster. It felt like rock climbing in grass. It was kind of an odd sensation, but here's my tribute to Arthur's Seat. When I go back to Edinburgh someday and I don't have pansies who can't handle the pelting rain holding me back, I will get to the top of Arthur. I swear it. This pic is a minute before the downpour. The weather changed just about every 5-10 minutes, which is really no different than England. I'm going to admit that the rain is getting to me. It's depressing. I just want to see the light of day.

After climbing Arthur's Seat, some of the others went to go buy some alcohol and the makings for dinner, while Genna and I went back to get a shower. Kohan and Taylar made spaghetti which was yummy. After that, we began a pub crawl at 7:30. I'm not going to tell you how much I had to drink, but I actually had less on Friday night and felt worse than Saturday night. I will tell you that I had a shot of Scottish Whiskey, though. And it burned. There were 5 pubs that we tackled on the crawl and then we ended at a dance club, which was basically a promiscuity promoter. Everyone around us was macking on each other and I wanted to vomit just looking at them. There are loads of pictures from the dance club and the pub crawl on Fbook if you want to check them out, but I'm not going to put them up here.

Sunday: We woke up and I had porridge in the morridge again. Shibby and I were watching Rhianna and Madonna's music videos and I explained to her that the reason they were so hot was because they had porridge in the morrige. Hence the reason I keep saying it. It's so good. YUM. I'm never buying flavored oatmeal again. I'm making it by myself for the rest of my life. Anyway, after this, our good tour guide friend, Liam, told us that "Tom Riddle" was buried in Greyfriar's graveyard, but proceeded to avoid taking us to the site of his grave. Kohan and I really wanted to see it, so Taylar, Kohan, Genna, Linds, and I walked back to the graveyard to hunt for it while Shibby toured the castle. I looked around for about half an hour and then finally found it. Wanna know how I found it? I used my critical thinking skills and asked myself if I was J.K.Rowling, where would I have found Tom Riddle? It was then that I saw the castle that inspired Hogwarts for Rowling out of the corner of my eye and began walking towards the graves surrounding it. After a quick scan, I found him and his family, only his name was spelled "Thomas Riddel." Nonetheless, it was him and I was proud to have found him because that means I must have some magic in me. I wanted to go all Expecto Patronus! at the grave since I'm a nerd and all, but Kohan wouldn't do it with me because he's too cool for school. He claims he just wanted a picture for his sister. Well, this one's for you, pops. I'm sure you would have been just as excited as I was when I found it!

After the search for Tom Riddle, we went to the Museum of Scotland. Our backpacks were a little too heavy to pay attention to the museum artifacts, so G-Salm and I gave up after about half an hour and went to the kidzone, which was pretty sweet. Then, I watched a presentation on fencing because I love fencing. If you don't know this about me, I was recruited for UNC's Varsity Girls Fencing team... you can believe that's a lie if you want, but Kelsey, Katherine and I know that it's true and that's all that really matters. Lindsay, Genna, and I said goodbye to the boys in the museum because Kohan loves museums and wanted to stay a little longer and Linds needed to get her train registration number online before we took off. It was kind of sad saying goodbye because even though we're all going to the same place, I know we won't get to spend that kind of quality time together before we leave and it just depressed me. I was pretty subdued and kept to myself all morning because it was such a fun weekend and I wasn't ready for it to be over.

Fiction Writing

So, I am taking two UNC online English courses since I'll be in DC all summer and want to graduate on time. One of mine isn't for either of my degrees, but is to stretch my ability as a fiction writer. We had about 11 assignments to accomplish in the last week, and 7 of them were writing openings to stories. I decided to post one of my favorite's on my blog. There are 6 more if you are interested in reading them, but I used Lindsay Saladino (Dino in this opening), Genna Salmon (Genevieve), Alexandra, Monique, Chelsea, Kohan, and Eric as inspiration. It's kind of embarassing posting this online, but I did my best to incorporate different voices in each opening. Here it is:

Siphon. Insert cork into hand corker. Position bottle underneath the corker. Pull the lever. Repeat. It was the same thing everyday, but to Dino it was a reminder of how far he’d come in the past few years. He couldn’t believe that it was only two years ago that he quit his job as a mechanical engineer for the BP oil company in Texas and moved to California to test his hand at grapes. His wife, Genevieve, said that his mid-life crisis was too much for her, so she left him a year later. It was okay with him though because he finally was in love with his work. And it wasn’t even skilled labor, it was picking grapes in the fall and mixing fruits to make his whites just a tad sweeter, or bitter, depending on his mood. Then, there was the bottling of course. There was nothing so rewarding as putting a complete bottle on his shelf and then snapping a label on it. Even if his friends and family thought he was crazy, he was proud of himself for taking such a great risk. Even graduating from Yale had nothing on the sense of accomplishment he felt when siphoning his wine.

Here's the one featuring Monique and Chelsea just for kicks:

BBBBRRRRNNNGGGG.
“Grab the phone,” demanded Monique. She was glad for the distraction because honestly she didn’t care to hear anymore gossip about her ex, Kevin, dating her college roommate and friend, Mel. It was depressing and she didn’t want to hear about it anymore.
“Hello?” asked Chelsea after she grabbed the phone.
“This is APD Detective Stevens, tell Monique to report immediately. There has been an incident in the state senate. Monique needs to get to the Sandoval Courthouse immediately,” shouted the voice over the phone before the dial tone signaled.
“Monique, what could you possibly have to do at the Sandoval Courthouse that would have an Albuquerque Detective demanding your help immediately?”
Shock took over Monique’s fallen face. She turned white, grabbed her car keys and sprinted to her car without another word to her best friend, Chelsea.

That's all... sorry for such a horrendously long post. I LOVE YOU, BABY KARYS.

ps- here are two reasons that I am quasi-excited to return to the US in 20 days:

http://smallbusiness.aol.com/article/_a/wacky-furniture-ad-becomes-web-sensation/20090519112409990001?icid=main|classic|dl3|link6|http%3A%2F%2Fsmallbusiness.aol.com%2Farticle%2F_a%2Fwacky-furniture-ad-becomes-web-sensation%2F20090519112409990001

http://www.facebook.com/ext/share.php?sid=96783098880&h=xXtgj&u=xDK36&ref=mf

Right Round

So many activities... So little time, so much to do. I wanted to post some pictures of my "Lindsay Day" in Bakewell, so here they are.

If you actually read this gravestone, I will be floored, but I will also love you for your sensitivity and human compassion.

Isn't she pretty? I love New England Sheep Dogs. Definitely one of my favorite breeds. I saw her a couple of times on my walk through the Bakewell village, and decided to snap a photo.

Duck fishing... no pun intended. This was in a little creek that I passed during my explorations. The ducks were putting on a show. Perhaps insignificant, perhaps not. It's up to you.

A picture from the cricket match I chanced upon. Neat, huh?

A fountain I discovered on my walk through a park in Bakewell that I became obsessed with the minute I found it. It's perfect.

In terms of recent happenings en mi vida... Sorry it's been over a week since my last post, but I needed to have some substance (aka material) before I proceeded with my writing excursion. First things first, Monique and I had a dance party over skype and we live 10 minutes away from each other. How creative is that? I just called her up and was like, "Mon-Mon, wait for it, wait for it..." and then I blared Flo Rida's "Right Round" over my iTunes. I started to dance wildly and told her to start dancing and then she just looked at me like I was mental for approximately 3 seconds, but then I guess she got over her fear because I looked back at her on our webcams and she, too, was shaking her thang. Needless to say, it was the study/writing break that we both needed. Plus that song is powerful in an unusual way. It's just intensity, bitterness, and obsession all rolled into one catchy hip-hop song that I just want to dance to every chance I get. In fact, I listened to it on my way back home from the movies tonight during my "lone" leg of the trip and just lost it going uphill until some random car ruined it for me. All that is besides the point, though, I just thought it was cool of Monique to dance in her room to a song playing in my room over skype. It was perfect and the exact amount of energy that I needed to expend in that 4 minute time period..

Last Saturday night, Alexandra's housemates threw their 3rd house party, which was a natural raver for all of the international kids. It was some good times. There were the usual "crazies," but it was all in good fun. I didn't feel like drinking (surprise, surprise) and so I just hung out with all of the drunk kids in town. Before heading to the party, however, I decided to draw a fake tattoo on myself to appear a little more edgy, but Kohan was the only one who caught it. Linds and I have been attempting to be a little more mysterious, but we're failing miserably at it. I don't know about Lindsay, but I really just like to know things about people, so I like to throw myself at people I haven't seen in awhile and ask them questions regarding the ins and outs of their lives, which is not mastering the art of mystery by any means. It's so hard for me not to be curious. That's all I am. I just want to know things. Kohan came up and asked me what I had been up to lately and I simply murmured, "this and that." He's quick as a cat and was immediately like, "what, are you trying to be vague or something?" I was devastated; nothing gets by him. I attempted a new personality and within minutes, he calls me out on something else. Lindsay and I busted out laughing, and that was the end of our intrigue, if you will, for the night. Kohan and I had a good conversation for awhile. Since, I lasted all of 3 minutes trying to be more mysterious, I decided to pester Kohan with questions that I knew would throw him off. And that's my shoutout to you, McNab, since you were disgruntled about the lack of Kohan appearing in my blog.

So, in America we celebrate this day called "Cinco de Mayo." Have you heard of it? This holiday, to my extreme vexation, is not celebrated worldwide. The English didn't know what to do with the American obsession with all things Mexican on this wonderful, beloved day of ours. On el cuatro del Mayo, aka Monday, Genna and I were chilling in the library commiserating over how we really needed to live it up over the next few weeks and store up 4 months of memories, when we decided to just start planning things. Genna wanted us to cook dinner and when she says "us," I knew she meant "me" just because I'll end up being the one to do it anyway and I agreed that we should cook for each other again. Then, it hit me that Tuesday was Cinco de Mayo so I was like, "Gen, let's have a party!" We got a little ahead of ourselves and took on a much bigger role than I think either of us ever intended, but it was still awesome. We made a facebook group right then and there and invited some of our international buddies for a Mexican fiesta and included some lyrics of Jimmy Buffet's "Margheritaville" to get people pumped. We decided that we would make enchiladas and our own spanish-rice concoction since you can't really get spanish rice here, and nachos. After I got out of my Irish writing class on tuesday (4 pm) we met at Tesco to get the ingredients and ended up spending approximately 57 GBP on food for everyone. We got craploads of food. I mean craploads. It was super heavy and by the time we checked out, we were both feeling really stressed out about getting all of the food done in time and wondering what the frick we got ourselves into. We live about 20-25 minutes from Tesco, and with all that food, well, you do the math. Un poco disgruntled.

We started cooking right away. Alexandra came over and took over the rice and bean concoction we created while I did all things chicken enchilada and Linds baked cookies. Genna ran around shrieking like a crazy woman and running to the store to grab extra things that Alexandra and I needed to get our food done. I was so proud of my chicken enchiladas. I mean it. I think they were the best freaking things I've ever made and I can't wait to make them again. They were a hit, and Alexandra's rice was muy popular as well. The four of us made a great team. These are the girls that showed up to our party + or - a few stragglers.

They're my buddies from all over the place in Genna and Lindsay's kitchen. And they all loved our Mexican food.

There's Alexandra, preparing the rice. :)

I probably made about 25 enchiladas easy and they were torn up. Girls can tear up food when they're hungry and they like what you have to offer. I thought it was pretty hilarious. After a little while, two Aussie boys and a New Zealander showed up to partake in our Mexican festivities as well. They came in and went straight for the food. It's satisfying watching guys eat your food like they'll never eat again because you know it means that they like it. I was happy. After having a table packed full of all kinds of nachos, guacamole dip, chips and salsa, cookies, enchiladas, rice, etc. etc., this was nearly the end result (stragglers of course came in to eat more as time went on):


Here are some more intimate photos that wound up on my camera during the night, thanks to some unknown camera thief, namely, Alexandra.

Mon-Mon and Genna-Bear with their Aussie lovers, Taylar and Rhys.

Ko-han the Bro-han looking stern. Probably because the N.Z.'s don't know how to handle a little spice in their Mexican food.

And this concludes the self-portraits I discovered on my digi. As usual, Linds is scared about what the future brings. Haha, just playing.

Other than that, I gave a presentation in my Economic Development course on whether the AIDS epidemic would prevent the Demographic Transition from occurring in Africa. I thought it was only going to be my professor, since that is what usually happens, but 11 people showed up. I wasn't really prepared for it, but I felt like a BAMF when they were taking notes during my lecture. Also, my professor announced how much he liked my research and analysis and wanted it posted on the MOLE site (their version of Blackboard), so I was feeling pretty good about myself. It's actually a remarkably interesting topic, as I knew it would be. I kept envisioning economic research in Africa; I don't know, we'll see.

Today, Chelsea, Monique and I went to see WOLVERINE. "HUGE" Jackman, as Kohan likes to call him, was flaming as usual. My favorite line was right at the end when he goes, "I'LL FIND MY OWN WAY." What a BAMF thing to say. I kept saying it during our walk home (Alex and Lindsay went to see Ghosts of Girlfriends Past while we were in Wolverine). I decided that if I could be mutant, I would want to be able to run and leap like VICTOR CREED, have eyes like Cyclops, and an additional uncanny protective shield that I am able to extend onto innocent civilians who need rescuing from precarious situations. Of course, I would be a good mutant. Anyway, it was great. I'm looking forward to Angels & Demons, Harry Potter, and Transformer 2. Amen? Amen.